Don't Contract Someone Else's Dis-ease

So, I think the Universe thought, "Oh, Brooke, you've been having it too easy lately.  Let me throw a zinger at ya so you have something to work on."  Cuz that's exactly what happened.  People happened. People with their own stuff happened.  People who must be suffering because all they seem able to offer the world right now is a whole lot of negativity and ugliness.  But what do you do when all that negativity becomes a direct assault on you?!

Let me tell you what my natural response is.  I want to attack back.  I want to yell.  I especially want to cuss...ALOT.  I want to figure out a way to show these folks their character defects somehow.  I want to scream "Stop being an A-hole, already!!!"

What is it that I actually do?  I do cuss...but in my mind and to my friends.  I bite my tongue and smile in front of these folks and say "all the right things" to them while I seethe with rage just below the surface.  I carry it around like a sack of cinder blocks until I'm utterly exhausted at the end of the day.   I start to doubt and think ill of myself.  I justify eating Reese's Cup after Reese's Cup until my tummy aches.

Where can I go from here?  Well, who is suffering now?  Based on my description above, does it not seem like I'm suffering too at this point?  I was feeling just fine earlier today--emotionally anyways--but some interactions I had left me feeling down-trodden...I more or less contracted the dis-ease that I came in contact with during my day.   The important thing I have to remember is that I allowed this to happen!  The truth is that we can't control other people or what happens to us but we sure as heck can choose how we respond.

So, what's the cure to this sickness?  The only thing that really works is a healthy cocktail of compassion, forgiveness, and love. (and maybe a few more Reese's cups :)  It's important to remember that these particularly challenging people are not on a mission to wreck my life...even though at times it may feel that way.  They are simply suffering and this is where the application of compassion comes in--by recognizing and honoring someone else's suffering.

Next comes the application of forgiveness.  If you wait for someone to apologize before you offer forgiveness, well then you are just keeping yourself down in the mire of suffering.  You can offer your forgiveness at any time to any one and you don't have to do it out loud.  This is simply an attitude you adopt--it's not a grand gesture.  You choose to forgive a person because in their state of suffering they erred by taking their pain out on others and you can relate to that.  You've been there too before, no?  It's pretty human for this to happen.  Let this be a reminder that when you're suffering not to let it seep out and infect others because you know how much it hurts on the other side of it.

And lastly...the application of love.  Radiate love.  Remember your inherent loving spirit and allow it to wash over everything.  You do in fact have the power to cleanse all the toxicity around you.   This is a choice you can make and it WILL have an impact.  It may take time for those in your environment to feel the impact, but you will feel it immediately.

Ahhhh.  That's better.  I wrote some mantras for one of my therapy groups today that are oh so appropriate for me this evening.  (thanks for the prep work, Universe!)  I'd like to share them here:

* I am ultimately responsible for myself.
* I am not a victim.
* I choose to respond to every difficult situation and interaction
     with love and a positive attitude.
* Nothing disturbs my inner peace.
* I choose to live in a state of forgiveness.

Yep...I'm better.  And I am ready for tomorrow--and not with an armor to protect myself from more anticipated unpleasantries...but with an even more open heart that's prepared to do more healing when needed for those who are clearly suffering.

I have the great capacity to love cuz I didn't catch the dis-ease after all.

mmmmm...hmmmmmm,
Brooke